Hey! Study uncovers yet more useless bits of research!

ACCORDING to a recent survey, 11 per cent of young adults believe Margaret Thatcher was prime minister during the First World War.

If you think that’s bad enough, a 2015 survey suggests that 20 per cent of youngsters believe fish fingers are fingers from actual fish. 

Problem is, people are always ready to express an opinion, even on subjects they know nothing about.

In one survey, 15 per cent of people said they were either for or against the Monetary Control Bill. The Monetary Control Bill doesn’t exist (Oops! Men are the worst offenders here according to ‘research’).

People also lie to pollsters. According to the British Election Study, 11.6 per cent of survey respondents claimed to have taken part in the 2010 general election despite not doing so. This accounts for 5.3 million people.

And then there are all these research ‘studies.’ 

Household cleaning products are as bad for lung function as smoking claims one recent investigation. And was it just yesterday we were told processed foods cause an increase in various sorts of cancer? What doesn’t, it seems?

Modern living exposes us to a range of chemicals that wouldn’t have been present in primitive societies. But life expectancy in times past was much lower than today. On balance, the contemporary world, although it presents new dangers, offers us the prospect of living well beyond the biblical three score plus 10.

Fortunately, no one believes any of these scare stories in any case. We’ve been saturated with so much doom and gloom (and still are) that you’d think that the world’s coming to an end tomorrow through disease, famine and pestilence.

I reckon dogs are far smarter than many of the individuals involved in any of these surveys or ‘studies.’ 

For instance, in a vet’s waiting room recently I was surprised to see owners pacing up and down, jingling coins in pockets, listlessly checking out posters and notices while all the dogs present were sitting, waiting calmly and patiently. 

Then I noticed the sign on the waiting room door: ‘Be back in five minutes, Sit! Stay!’