Beware the sleeping tortoise

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MOBILISATION: One million marching oldies would be a sight to see.

IMAGINE just a small proportion of Britain’s 10 million pensioners deciding to take action

The more I read about the declining state of Britain and the abandoning of traditional values, the more I am convinced that the only way to restore sanity to our country is to rally the troops of the forgotten generation. 

If ever we ‘golden agers’ were organised into a cohesive force, there is no end to what could be achieved; after all, there are some 10 million pensioners in the UK alone.

Imagine a mass demonstration of a million or so curmudgeonly old dodderers in the centre of London demanding a reinstatement of common sense, with decisions made based on what is inherently right and not politically expedient. 

It would be an incredibly noisy affair with state of the art sound systems available to the speakers so that the hard of hearing could catch every word, although the screech from hearing aid feedback would be excruciating.

Then, having whipped the crowd up into a frenzy of flatulence and denture gnashing, off we would totter towards Downing Street and – unless the stewards were on the ball – anywhere else in Southern England that the absent-minded headed for.   

Naturally, all establishments en route with toilet facilities would need to be put on red alert.   

If all went well and we arrived at our destination before winter set in, forget the passive protest. Actually charging at the police lines would be overly ambitious, but we could limp and shuffle into them with the intention of forcing our way into Number 10.  

Who would dare wade into a crowd of old codgers? Any policeman beating up an octogenarian would be a marked man and have his face splashed across every front page in the land. And water-cannons would be definitely out of the question; the risk of pneumonia would be too strong.  

We tend to forget the voting power that we command (we tend to forget a lot, actually) and the potential power that is at our disposal. 

Not so much a sleeping tiger, admittedly, more a napping tortoise, but nevertheless…

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