UEFA Euro 2012

I ask this question with tongue in cheek… What position will Vladimir Putin play?

Sweeper, possibly, as he tends to shift a lot of things under the carpet, or could he be a midfielder, dictating, creating and pointing!

Another question to consider: How will the team be poisoned if they fail to reach the knockout stage? Plutonium in tea?

The tournament is, of course, co-hosted by near neighbours Ukraine, so that seems logical. Joking apart… let’s be serious kidding.

The Russian team comprises several ‘big name players’ who have starred for major European teams.

They are hot favourites to win Group A, but will have to get their act together after failing to qualify for the 2010 World Cup in South Africa.

Igor Afinfeev from CSKA Moscow, is one of the most underrated goalkeepers in the world.

The back line will be missing a vital player, one of the Berezutsky twins, Vasili, who has been ruled out due to a damaged hip. His brother, Alexei, will continue to anchor a solid defence that features veteran campaigner Alexandr Anyukov and former Chelsea man Yuri Zhirkov.

You can readily expect the Russians to spring attacks from deep, especially if Zhirkov plays in his customary left back position.

Surprisingly Russia have struggled in midfield of late, even with the highly-rated Igor Denisov anchoring the middle of the pitch.

But at times coach Dick Advocaat has asked hit and miss Arsenal star Andrey Arshavin to sit in there and to get forward as often as possible.

There’s no doubt the experienced coach Advocaat will encourage his players to attack in numbers and Fulham’s Pavel Pogrebnyak and former Tottenham Hotspur striker Roman Pavlyuchenko will be key players here.

And as a result, we can expect every game played by Russia to be exciting regardless of the result.

This will be Advocaat’s last tournament as coach (he’s already accepted the PSV Eindhoven manager job) so he would love to go out on a high.

Something major will have to happen, if this is to become reality, because although they should get through to the knockout stage, Russia will be blown away after that… even if Arshavin explodes into action!